The Anti-vaxx Chronicles aren’t going anywhere, but it gets to be a grind sometimes. So I will occasionally mix it up with Parler Watch, exploring other conservative media outlets. Reddit’s r/ParlerWatch subreddit tracks the ridiculousness and is the source of all material I pull.

You’re in luck today—you get to learn about the NESARA conspiracy theory, and the poor saps who fall for this crap!

NESARA started life innocuously enough as a proposed bill, submitted by a random guy in Louisiana named Harvey Francis Barnard; it would replace the national income tax with a national sales tax, among other reforms. He self-printed 1,000 copies of the book in 1996 and titled it “Draining the Swamp: Monetary and Fiscal Policy Reform.”

You see where this is going, right? 

Anyway, he sent those copies to elected officials in D.C., convinced that it was so self-evidently brilliant that it would easily become  Those officials threw the books out, almost assuredly unread. But an online conspiracy theorist named Shaini Candace Goodwin, known online as the “Dove of Oneness,” latched on to the proposal after he posted the text online, believing it was an actual piece of legislation signed into law by President Bill Clinton. In addition to what Bernard had proposed, Goodwin piled on her own wish-list on this make-believe law: the distribution of trillions of dollars of “prosperity funds” to Americans, the cancellation of all debt, abolishing the IRS, and declaring world peace. 

Goodwin claimed the law was supposed to take effect on September 11, 2001, and that the terrorist attacks that day were orchestrated by President George W. Bush in order to prevent its implementation. Apparently, the computers with the data needed to distribute the trillions all lived in the second story of one of the World Trade Center towers. Why? Just because, that’s why. 

Why wasn’t anyone talking about NESARA at the time? Because the Supreme Court had implemented a gag order, under the threat of death, to squelch any discussion. 

So here we are on conservative Telegram, and an account claiming to be John F Kennedy Jr is posting that “Promises Made, Promises Kept NESARA IS HERE.” Remember, JFK Jr is a major component of the QAnon world conspiracy. A sizable contingent of them have been expecting him to reappear in Dallas, triumphantly emerging after decades of battling child trafficking in the shadows. 

There’s so much sad in that screenshot above. 

1. Kennedy can’t show up in Dallas, but he’s definitely that random unverified account on Telegram.  

2. That post has gone viral. Because the Q nuts actually believe it’s real. 

3. The original conspiracy theory claimed trillions would be distributed. But if everyone got $150 million, that would be. … 4.95 and 16 zeroes. What is that …? A quadrillion has 15 zeroes… Yeah, I don’t know. But if they hate inflation now, just you wait!

4. Who keeps $150 million in a Rewards Checking Account? 

But if that wasn’t sad enough, the responses … oh my. 

They really do believe they’re going to get free money from JFK Jr, which is totally not socialism, unlike federal benefits currently doled out. 

That poor woman with the dying child? OMG, clinging to false hope. But money isn’t what she needs. What is this “med beds”? Well, it’s another Q conspiracy that claims the government has magical beds that cure all disease. Gonna take a little detour here, and peer into a Q forum discussing Med Beds.

“Revealed finally.” OMFG. If some company invented this device, they’d be a multi-trillion dollar company overnight! Why would anyone want to operate such a miraculous device in the dark, in secrecy? They are so fucking gone; they can’t even deploy the most basic shreds of common sense. 

Wow.

Every single time I fall into a QAnon rabbit hole, it literally leaves me breathless. 

They are living in an altogether different universe, with zero bearing on reality. And being wrong, again and again and again and again has zero bearing on their desperate need to keep believing. 

Though it’s definitely been smart of the various cranks to tie their own pet conspiracies into the Q web, so flat earthers now have new life, and potential recruits, by tapping other gullible brain-dead qultists. And maybe some of them aren’t actually not that stupid. Maybe they’re just desperate, like the mom with the dying child at home, scouring the internet for any shred of hope. Science can’t save her baby, and so her frantic search has led her down these charlatans offering false hope. 

“Early Christmas” was likely yet another failed promise of Trump’s triumphant return and the roundup of child-trafficking Democrats. But really, she needs those med beds. And the promise of their arrival with be just as empty. 

And if that’s not bad enough, the asshole immediately underneath thinks leukemia can be cured with vitamin C and boron. 

One guy is like “PROVE IT” and everyone else is like “Nah, it’s totally real!”

Of course, the government can provide food, but that’s socialism. 

“EBS” is “emergency broadcast system,” which will supposedly be activated to declare martial law when Trump triumphantly returns to his rightful throne. 

The current admin sent a monthly check to all families with children at home. Republicans (and Joe Manchin) killed it. So if Mitzi191 couldn’t make it with the extra $250-300 monthly per child, shit is about to get much tougher. 

But sure, pray that $150 million will magically be deposited into your account. It’ll totally work. Just like praying for “EBS,” Trump’s reinstatement, JFJ Jr’s return, Hillary Clinton’s arrest, and the mass arrest of the global child trafficking elite.